Memo to Hillary supporters: Sit down and shut up!

There are three things that irritate me in this world: Chicago White Sox fans, ketchup on hot dogs, and die hard supporters of Hillary Clinton.

For the sake of appropriateness, I will focus on the final selection.

Hillary supporters, I will keep this short and sweet: sit down, shut up, and get over your own disillusioned dreams of rebellion. All you are doing is hurting the democratic party and embarrassing yourselves in the process.

This is the part of the blog where I am supposed to slightly contradict myself, giving Hillary credit for running a, *cough*, great campaign, and how she has now opened the door for myriads of bitchy women to run for the presidency. Well, at least the latter is true!

Look, the core constituents of Hillary's fan base--old people who remember the prominence of the 90s, racist southerners who don't want a black man president, and crusty women who support her out of necessity--can support her until Iran bombs the US. It's their freedom as American citizens. What they should STOP doing, effective immediately, is proclaiming that their support for Mrs. Clinton is because A) she was a fantastic candidate, B) the party is being unfair to her, and C) once again, she DID run a fantastic campaign!

Let's take this one step at a time. Hillary was nothing special as a candidate. Despite a senatorial career that has been less-than exceptional, Hillary's presidency began with more fireworks than the opening ceremony to the 2008 Olympic games. Why? because she was the first viable female candidate in US history. Hillary's candidacy was nothing more than a careful construction of polling-influenced decisions, all pieced together to create a candidate that n-sync with the liberal majority of this country while not too liberal for the conservative crowd that loved the prominence of the 90s. In other words, be Bill, not Dennis Kucinich.

This brings me to her campaign, one of the most foulest, most arrogant campaigns in recent memory. Basically, Hillary ran a campaign of inevitability. She was a Clinton. The name spoke for itself. While her campaigning in Iowa featured PLENTY of Clintonesque flip-flopping (such as her famous statement that she never really voted for the Iraq war resolution), Clinton's campaign was lazy. While Obama was running a grassroots campaign of town-meetings, chain-emails, and door-to-door stops, Clinton sat on her thrown, testing the wind and enjoying her substantive lead in polling and financing. She WAS the Democratic nominee. This WAS her time. Oh, what a surprise she had!

We all know what happened next--Obama won the Iowa caucus. Though Hillary scored a surprise victory in New Hampshire (overplaying it as her "comeback"), the air of inevitability continued to South Carolina, where Obama and his supporters gave her a supreme bitch slap of grassroots organization. Yet the arrogance still continued, right up until Super Tuesday, where Clinton and her asshole strategist, Mark Penn, were convinced that her name power and nostalgia for the 90s would squash the brass young candidate from Chicago. Again, so arrogant and SO WRONG!

If we're to view this from Clinton's perspective, she got her clock cleaned on Super Tuesday. Failing to win even a majority of the delegates, Clinton's campaign was left in shambles following the demonic day of voting. Why? BECAUSE HER CAMPAIGN HAD NO STRATEGY BEYOND SUPER TUESDAY. Obama exploded off of his surprise showing, racking up 11 straight victories in the following weeks and creating a lead in delegates that proved to be insurmountable.

Following this route of contests, Clinton's campaign deconstructed to what political-junkies like myself always knew it was--Karl Rove with a bad hairdo. The many instances have already been chronicled, like the campaign's darkening of Obama's skin in commercials to make him appear more "black," her comment that Obama was not a Muslim "as far as" she "knew," her RIDICULOUS pandering to Michigan and Florida voters to have their delegates seated, and the horrid sell-out to Indiana voters over the gas tax (officially the dumbest fucking idea since "they hate us for our freedom"). Roveian to the inch.

So, Hillary's campaign for president can be called a wealth of adjectives, but "good" and any synonym of it is not one of them.

Finally, I am so tired of hearing about how unfair Howard Dean, Nancy Pelosi, and Harry Reid have been to Hillary, and how she "deserves" more respect from the party leaders.

Hillary should have dropped out of the race in March, when Obama's delegate lead was unmatchable. Her constant campaigning in Texas, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Indiana, and North Carolina has developed exactly what pundits said it would: a schism in the party that no speeches of unity and hollow calls for action can mend.

How do I know this? because there are STILL Hillary supporters organizing during the DNC, talking about how they want their voices heard and Hillary respected! Some have even made the outlandish statement that Clinton will walk away from the convention the party's nominee.

And are Bill and Hillary doing anything to stop this? Until tonight, not really. We still get reports of tension between the Clinton and Obama supervisors, right down to Bill's bitching over what the topic of his speech will be at Obama's DNC.

Pretty much, nothing good came of Clinton's never ending campaign. Standing on the DNC floor today, she has less respect, A LOT less money, and a small group of psychopath devotees. Whatever this group does, the cause of this ugly effect is crystal clear, and Hillary is undoubtedly to blame.

So, fans of the Hillary cult, PLEASE sit down and PLEASE shut up. You only hurt the party and abuse our intellects.